Sunday, October 26, 2008

Enabling

Drinking, for anyone who knows me has been a long term, passion, shall we say. From the first night I drank alcohol and threw up in my parents kitchen, to tonight where I have had five "casual" beers, alcohol consumption has taken on a part of my life. It is normal. I don't drink because I want to "fit in" or because I desire to "repress" certian memories, I just drink. I don't drink much soda, or tea, or basically anything besides water that isn't alcohol related. Mainly because I enjoy the taste of most alcoholic drinks, whether it is a glass of chardonay on a hot summer day or two fingers of Glenlivet scotch on a cold winter's night, it all goes down like the finest french cheese on a lover's palet; I drink alcohol for the taste.... most of the time.

Now with that disclaimer laid out, I will confess that I do binge drink with the best of them. I take pride in the amount I can drink and still keep my intelect and understanding about me; which by all accounts is really a foolish thing to take pride but here I stand. I have seen countless nights where I couldn't see... straight that is. And I have discussed everything from religion to anarchy, alchemy to philosophy and everything in between upon drinking a few tasty beverages, so do not take stalk nor insult in what I write from hence forth. It is for my own pleasure and for the few who may come across this with an open mind looking for nothing more than a drunk persons ramlings.

Funny for me, a self confessed alcoholic (without a problem in need of rehad, maybe just a couple days of sobriety) to land in a society slightly obsessed with drinking. Having a high tolerance, or being a strong drinker as it is said here, is something to be coveted and respected in the place I find myself. As such, my prior conditioning has served me well so far. Although being a "strong drinker" is something respected and slightly awed in college aged persons of America, among adults and families it is almost seen as taboo. Certainly nothing to boast or brag about, but almost not even something to mention. I can't remember a conversation I have had where some above the age of 21 asked me if I had a high tolerance, or was a strong drinker. What a interesting difference.

Not long ago, I was at a "pub" (for lack of a better word I will use pub, but that doesn't quite describe it) and was asked if I was a strong drinker by a woman who must be in her 60's bare minimum. I don't say her age to insult, I only wish to illuminate my point. Which is that I have become a member of a culture who embraces drinking not only as insolent children wishing to break free of their parents reign of control, but also as grandmothers who still find it a strength to be able to "put back" their fare share of alcohol while holding on to their sanity. I won't say whether more drinking happens here, or where I am from... but the attitude is slightly different. Similarly, so is the approach.

Drinking until one is beyond drunk seems to be completely accepted, which I can illistrate. Upon leaving a bar I frequent I found a couple of men probably my age passed out on the sidewalk, and slightly in the planters of the street I was walking on. I was walking by myself but by no means was the only person on the street. My first thought was do they need help. My second, I wonder if they will be arrested. Should I try to wake them up so as to help them avoid such trouble, however nobody else around seem to be taking any such notice, nore any care. So I walked on by. I have seen a girl being litteraly carried out of the bar, hopefully by friends and hopefully home, by four guys. I have seen, only two nights ago, a girl so drunk almost seeming to be convusing on the steps of a closed retail shop, supported by friends, basically showing the world her underwear for lack of conciousness. Most disturbing, on my way home one Saturday night, a man most likely in his sixties sat on the steps of a closed restuarant with his head in his hands and puke in between his feet.

It is quite a different situation than what I am used to, and from what I can tell, it is actually getting to be less of a drinking society. Although I don't think there are any laws that correspond to out drunk in public laws, it supposedly is getting less common for older people to binge drink. Hmmmmmmm.... is all I can really say.

As I began, I shall finish. I am a drinker, and by no means has this made me think twice about drinking. In fact, I am presently leaving for my neighborhood bar. However, I have thought the difference in attitude somewhat astounding for quite some time and felt a small need to write about it.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

The 5 haiku to a better life

5. Be happy with life. Be happier than your ex. Be happy with less.
4. Enjoy living life. Love the smaller things in life. Enjoy what you do.
3. Do not hate the world. In fact, do not hate anything. Quit hating your ex.
2. Laugh out loud a lot. Use smiles as much as you can. Laugh with and not at.
1. God invented beer. God wants us to be happy. Beer makes me happy.

Why I may be an alien... the 30 hour day.

I began thinking about this some time ago, the concept that I may not be from this planet that is. My theory is this: My body seems to want to work off a 30 hour day, not a 24 hour day. I realize this may sound slightly preposterous but just listen to the facts, and see if I don't change your mind. I can stay awake for a very long period of time and in fact enjoy doing so. I also enjoy sleeping for a long time, and anyone who knows me can attest to that. I personally need roughly 10 hours of sleep to feel good, but if I get that much sleep I can be awake for 20 hours very easily. Both my day and my night need to be elongated, and if you notice, my relative theory of time still holds true the the old maxim 1/3 sleep (8 hours) and 2/3 awake (16 hours) during a normal Earth day.

For the skeptics who ask why I can't remember this other planet I am from I say this; if I was from Earth, after 25 years of life why wouldn't my body and mind have adjusted to the cycle of the planet like humans. Why do I crave a longer awake period and longer sleeping period. It is not that I want to get more out of my day than a 24 hours day allows, nor more sleep than it allows, it is that my body speaks to me and tells me to stay awake, do more or go back to bed your not ready to wake up yet. So as you can see, it is not my mind that has created a simple delusion, it is my soul that tells me this is all true. Luckily my mind can rationalise what my soul is trying to tell me, that I need a 30 hour day because the planet I am from has one.

For eons and eons my race, shall we call me an ICUHURRT, have lived on a planet that has a 30 hour day. This of course is as innate in me as a 24 hour day is in all of you. What else could be the explanation of an instinct so primal, so real, so cognitive except that I belong to another race not of this 24 hour world, but that in fact I come from somewhere different, somewhere that a 30 hour day is what is real.

I do not make these claims to suggest by any means that a 30 hour day is better, or I for having been from a 30 hour day planet am better than any human. As I said before, the point of my 30 hour day is not to get more out of my day and not to say that I think humans would be better off with a 30 hour day. In fact it is almost the opposite, you would have more time to do the same amount. And for those of you who know me, hence my tendency towards laziness and procrastination, my whole body is telling me I have more time to complete everything I need to do in the day. I only present this valid information as a testimony to the reality of my life. Anyone in my position would do the same.

Now the only problem I have run into with this theory is testing it. To accomplish a valid test, I would need a large warehouse with no windows. Obviously the sun shining through during what should be my night would throw a wrench into the experiment. Also, I wouldn't be able to go to work or do normal human activities in the outside world because my 30 hour day world would be running a 6 hour difference the second earth day, 12 the third, 18 the fourth, the fifth day I would be 6 hours ahead, but it would end the same and start over again on the 6 day. With that kind of schedule I wouldn't be able to complete Earth activities. A long vacation period would be needed, which is difficult when even though I am not from this planet, I still need to live on this planet, earn money and have an Earth life. The other experimental difficulty that arises out of this is that work is an essential part of life, how long should the work day be? Would I work during the test? What other parameters would have to be considered? It is difficult to say since I am not sure what ICUHURRT people do?

Is this a theory that can be tested, maybe... maybe not. But does one really need a laboratory test after the logic and facts I have presented? I think not. The conclusion is obvious, I must not be from Earth. Or maybe I am just a night person and hate the mornings, but either way thanks for reading.